• Korinna Duke

Rejection.

"After careful consideration & assessment, we regret to inform you that our agency will not be able to work with you toward your goal of fostering/adopting a child."


My heart sank and then a fire burned within me. "You mean to tell me that we were rejected before they even talked to us? We are a loving couple ready and willing to love on babies and they won't even talk to us about our application!"


To go back a little, my husband and I have spent many conversations talking about foster care and have prayed about what that would look like for us. So when we decided to just go for it, we chose a local agency that we've volunteered with. In my initial investigation I saw that their requirements was being married for four years. My husband and I have only been married 2.5 years (at the beginning of this process) and so I knew there was a chance to be rejected, but I didn't really think it possible nor did I prepare for that.


So in faith we sent in our 11 page pre-application to the agency and waited. I waited two days to receive an email. With excitement I opened the email to read those words. Rejected. But no worries, I replied back explaining that we'd love to talk with someone about this "requirement" and hoped it would possible to still be accepted because after all the classes and training we'd be closer to 3.5 years married. I got a response simply stating that no one could talk with me because they can't even turn in my application because of this rule.


Man, I felt discouraged. How could we be rejected before anyone even chatted with us? I would feel better if they just took some time to talk with us before rejecting us. Even a phone call would've been better than a cold and short email. We just wanted to do what we were called by God to do and love children. I'm not going to lie, my attitude was bitter for a few days. Luckily I am married to a man who is level headed and wise. He sweetly reminded me that this agency wasn't our only option and that God was simply leading us to a different one.


Through advice from friends and encouraging conversations, we were led to our current agency. In hindsight, I am so glad we were rejected by the other agency because I love our caseworker and have had nothing but good experiences with the agency as we prepare our home and our lives for foster children.


I wish I could tell you that all along I was trusting in God's higher plan, but my attitude was far from pleasent. I am abundantly thankful that my Father God is in control and chose to graciously guide me through wise counsel from my husband and friends. We know the foster-to-adopt life isn't going to be easy or follow my "well thought out plan" for how this is going to go, but I thank the Lord that his mercies are new every day despite how I act!


If you've found yourself in a similar situation, I hope this can encourage you! Maybe your rejection isn't God saying "no," but really his way of guiding you toward a different path. So often we can choose to give up because we've been rejected. But remember, in those moments of rejection, seek counsel from other people, pray for God's guidance and then discern what needs to be done. God's got this under control, so you can move boldly ahead!



**I hope this post doesn't make anyone feel anger or resentment toward this agency that rejected us. I have nothing but respect for anyone that's working toward giving children a better life and uniting families together.